Her stepmother, Betty Cooper, died in January in the Donnell House in Washington.
“She didn’t have hospice until the last few days. I was ready to get involved, but I didn’t realize it was going to be that fast,” Molinaro said.
Her brother, George Cooper, 63, a resident of the Washington County Health Center, has had hospice care for about a year.
“There is such a misconception with hospice,” Molinaro said. “They can be there for the last few hours, and they’ve been there for him for a year.”
Hospice places the focus on care, not a cure. To be eligible for hospice care, patients must have a life-limiting illness and be seeking no cure, said Lori Bibbee, a certified hospice and palliative nurse. Bibbee addressed a session on the basics of hospice at Canonsburg General Hospital earlier this month.
“Our goal is to get to the patient before the very end,” Bibbee said. That allows hospice workers to build a relationship with patients and their families.
“It’s self-determined life closure, and they can revoke if they wish to seek treatments,” Bibbee told the audience.
When the word hospice is mentioned, most think of cancer. That, however, Bibbee said, is a misconception. Anyone with a terminal or life-ending diagnosis is eligible, such as end-stage heart, liver or lung disease, AIDS or neurological disease.
Most insurances cover the hospice program, with about 90 percent of the patients under government Medicare coverage.
Ron Roach of Bulger said his mother’s physician first brought up the issue of hospice more than two years ago when Elsie Roach, diagnosed with congestive heart failure, was projected to have six months to live.
“We were at the doctor’s office and he said, ‘Elsie, this is not just for people who die,’” Ron Roach said.
Since then, hospice has been a big part of the Roaches’ household. Like Molinaro, the Roaches used Southern Care based in Houston.
Provided through hospice are nurses, prescription care, social workers, in-home health aides, pastoral care and volunteers willing to do daily household tasks or to simply sit and talk.
“They talk to you about what can happen and what to expect at any time. I enjoy when Father Joe comes. We talk about everyday things,” Roach said of Father Joseph Lewandowski, who works in pastoral care.
Lori Romanetti of North Strabane Township also used hospice for her mother, Betty Donnelly.
Donnelly lived with her daughter until she died in April 2008. She was in hospice for about five months.
“My mom had Parkinson’s disease, and there was nothing more to do and she’d gotten a staph infection and a multitude of things happened,” Romanetti said. “She didn’t want to be in the hospital anymore, and she didn’t want anymore done. It was her choice.”
Choice of care is exactly what hospice is all about, Bibbee said.
Bibbee said she’s discovered people tend to die as they’ve lived. The quiet ones prefer to die in a sedate, private way. The more flamboyant ones choose a more open way to pass away.
“We don’t talk about death with hospice patients. It’s more, ‘Did my life have meaning?’” Bibbee said.
Comfort, or palliative care, is one of the most important aspects of hospice. However, while all hospice is palliative care, not all palliative care is hospice.
Many seeking palliative care also actively seek a cure. Those on hospice have ended that search, but their final years or months are as comfortable and as medically noninvasive as possible.
“My mom didn’t want any more heroic measures. She just wanted to be kept comfortable,” Romanetti said.
Molinaro works at the health center where her brother lives. He has congestive heart failure, diabetes and renal failure, and he has had strokes and open-heart surgery.
“They help me on that one-on-one because I’m in and out all the time,” Molinaro said. “They talk to you and come to me and review what they think.’
Roach said hospice assistance is invaluable.
“I take care of her myself,” he said. “My mother, her mind is as sharp as a pencil. She reads the paper and she tell me everything when I come home. We have a big family, and they come all the time – brothers, sisters and sister-in-law – but we never thought of hospice until the doctor suggested it.”
Like Roach, Romanetti said she provided the day-to-day living essentials for her mother.
“There was still care involved by the family. Believe me, she was total care. She couldn’t walk or dress herself, and, at times, she couldn’t feed herself,” Romanetti said. “Through hospice, I was able to get away for five days and they worked out something for respite care.”
All three families said they would recommend hospice care for a family member facing a life-ending disease.
“These folks are angels sent from God,” Romanetti said. “They are a comfort to the patient and family involved. Some days, my mom just wanted to talk, and they sat there and held her hand and talked.”