‘Twas three nights before Christmas, and my family and I
Were at an awesome Christmas party, though late we arrived.
We brought cookies and added our food to the table
That was laden with goodies so rich they were fabled.
The other guests had eaten, they all had been fed,
And the children were off playing dress-up instead.
The adults were all talking – conversations so fine –
Perhaps due in part to consumption of wine.
After we ate and the food was cleared away,
We gathered in the living room for the point of the day.
Not hugging our friends, our children, our mother,
But to open up gifts, then steal them from one another.
When the Jack of Spades was called, I picked from the pile,
Opened it, showed it, and laughed all the while.
Then I hid it behind me so quick to forget,
That I didn’t own those dishes quite yet.
They could be taken by anyone still with a card,
If they could remember who had them, which often is hard.
The game’s action was heated, and the pace pretty quick.
And the list of nice gifts was awfully thick:
A snow globe, some candles, and pretty, nice dishes,
There were lottery tickets, and lures for some fishes.
But the things that kept us laughing for hours,
Were the Black and Gold false lashes, and Monkey Butt powder.
There was Steelers gear, mugs, and gift cards galore,
And a traction set that hooked over a door.
There were games, an umbrella, and stuff for the bath,
But the giant, karaoke-singing deer head really made us laugh.
When the game was all over, the hours whiled away,
We said with some sadness that we could no longer stay.
We knew that our kiddos really needed some sleep,
So we thanked our hosts and headed into the deep.
The love of good friends in our hearts we had nestled,
And we took with us the gifts that hadn’t been embezzled.
And as we drove away, we shouted with cheer,
We love coming over – we’ll see you next year!
Laura Zoeller can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.