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Rolling on the Yough

3 min read

Friedrich Nietzsche once said, “That which does not kill us makes us stronger,” to which I want to respond with, “Really?” I don’t feel stronger.

Last Saturday, I went on my second, and most likely last, whitewater rafting trip.

The first one was a lot of fun because I didn’t die. The second one was a lot less fun because I almost did. While it’s evident I have a flair for the dramatic, I am pretty sure I’d be the special guest star at a funeral if things had gone even slightly more wrong.

We were four mighty rafts on the Youghiogheny that day.

There were six people on my raft, which was one person too many considering how low the water was. Don’t worry: I rectified the situation by falling out of it. Boom. Splash. I struggled for air and had to glide my way back to the raft.

Luckily, I remembered my instructions to keep my nose and toes above water (they warn against swimming normally because your feet can get caught on the rocks).

Thinking back to the instructions, I realized too many sentences ended with, “If you don’t do it this way, you’ll die.”

If you don’t wear a helmet, you’ll die. If you don’t wear your life vest, you’ll die. If you don’t keep your feet up, you’ll die.

After I nearly drowned, I was sort of over it in a big way. Water: Over it, because I was under it. I didn’t feel safe and I wanted out. Unfortunately, I had to continue to ride the rapids until we could get to a safe exit point. I was terrified as we hit every single rapid and rock on the way.

Finally, I got to a safe extraction point.

It was a surprisingly short walk back to the rental office, even though I was carrying a life vest, paddle and helmet. Once I was there and turned in my equipment, all I had to do was wait for my friends to finish the trip. I decided to go swimming.

Yes, in the very same water that tried to kill me. I really didn’t have too many options.

My wallet, cellphone and car keys were seven miles away, locked up in another car at the exit to the river ride.

I got in the water at a relatively calm spot. I didn’t want to be afraid of it. P.S.: Two days later, I dreamt about a group of teens who could turn into fish. I am completely sure it’s unrelated. (Rolls eyes.)

I am glad to report the rest of trip was eventful but not life-threatening.

I heard one boat capsized twice, but everyone survived, which is the best part of the story.

Once I got my car keys, wallet and cellphone we all drove to dinner afterward. Yes, I was slightly embarrassed for abandoning them, but I decided alive and embarrassed was better than the alternative.

At dinner, I drank copious amounts of water. I wanted revenge.

While I don’t feel stronger for having survived, I am pretty happy I’m still alive.

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