Tempest in a coffee cup
When I was kid, I sat in church and, as my mother phrased it, “passed gas.” Mom chastised me under her breath in the way that all mothers since time immemorial have corrected their flatulent children: “Don’t do that in church!” To which I would respond, usually quite loudly, “Why?” “It’s not nice!” she would whisper. So I stopped. At least for a week.
If only Joshua Feuerstein could have heard and heeded my mother’s advice. Because Feuerstein, a former television and radio evangelist, certainly vents hot air, albeit from a higher orifice.
Feuerstein does so mainly via his Facebook page and website, spewing forth anti-Muslim, anti-gay and anti-Obama pronouncements in his guise as a self-declared “radical.” Last week, he received attention for starting a social media campaign against Starbucks because, in his eyes, the coffee-hawking chain has fired yet another salvo in the imaginary “War on Christmas.” How? By choosing to use plain red holiday cups this year.
Using his best irate-conservative-talk-show-host voice in a video posted to Facebook, Feuerstein proclaims: “Do you realize that Starbucks wanted to take Christ and Christmas off of their brand new cups? That’s why they’re just plain red.”
Feurstein also claims (inaccurately) that “Starbucks isn’t allowed to say ‘Merry Christmas’ to customers.” Feuerstein then says he “tricked” Starbucks by telling the barista that his name is “Merry Christmas.” (Baristas ask for a customer’s name, then write the name on the cup and call out the name when the order is ready.)
This reminds me of one of Bart Simpson’s famous phone pranks, in which he calls Moe’s Tavern and tricks its hapless owner into asking if “Al Coholic” is at the bar. Because Feurstein’s “radical” behavior is just as juvenile.
Feuerstein further urges “great Americans and Christians around this great nation” to follow his practice, then take a “Christmas selfie” with their Starbucks cups. He ends the video by telling Starbucks that, “just to offend you,” he wore a Jesus T-shirt into the store and “since you hate the Second Amendment,” also carried his gun.
Note: Starbucks doesn’t ban the wearing of religiously oriented T-shirts; although the company frowns upon customers carrying guns at its locations, it has not banned the practice. And Feuerstein lives in Arizona, an “open carry” state. So his was no great act of civil disobedience, but merely an example of the exercising of rights. Kinda like Starbucks choosing to use plain red cups.
Depressingly, but not surprisingly, Feuerstein’s video attracted attention, receiving more than 11 million views. Comments on it come from detractors and supporters alike. One supporter took the trouble to catalog Starbucks holiday cup designs from the past several years. He gleefully points out how the company has moved away from using “Christmassy” symbols, such as snowflakes, reindeer, pine needles and stars, until it arrived at this year’s mostly featureless design.
Problem is, with the exception of stars, none of the symbols Starbucks has used during Christmases past can be construed as promoting Christianity – unless, that is, you think that the biblical Bethlehem is in Pennsylvania, Mary arrived astride a caribou during a blizzard and a Douglas fir towered over the stable.
“Starbucks hates Jesus!” is the headline Feurstein chose for his video. C’mon, Josh. A plain red cup no more disses Christianity than a plain black cup promotes Satanism.
As an example of a self-described Christian giving Christianity a bad name, Feurstein sticks out like a burned-out bulb on a string of holiday lights. He and his ilk would have you believe that Jesus and his disciples walked around the Holy Land kicking butt and taking names, forcing reluctant Jews and gentiles to buy “Son of God” T-shirts and subscribe to religious views which at the time were considered blasphemous. Maybe in their translation of the New Testament, J.C. and his boys also went packing.
What’s even more problematic than Feuerstein’s concept of being persecuted is that many Christians believe it. Yes, it’s true that Christians are persecuted, and sometimes killed, because of what they believe. But followers of all religions have been, are and will continue to be persecuted and killed for their faith.
Besides, if Christians believe that what is written in the Bible is true, they must also realize that Jesus warned that his followers would be persecuted for their belief. They should expect and accept it as the price of faith.
But they should not see persecution in the color scheme of a coffee cup.
It’s not nice.