Don’t put off until tomorrow
Q.I have this thing I do where I put off finishing things. I procrastinate for school assignments. I go online, I text with friends, I’ve even cleaned my room instead of finishing a school assignment I hate. I do OK on tests but my homework is always late so I lose points. Any ideas on time management?
-16-year-old
Mary Jo’s response: After we spoke last week, you took time to write about your problem in time for me to use it in this week’s column. You didn’t procrastinate! Maybe acknowledging the habit is a good first step to managing it.
When I re-read your text, I realized you’d already analyzed part of the problem. You said you had difficulty finishing a school assignment you hated. Is it possible you avoid the things you don’t want to do? There’s no thrill in some school assignments; you may put them off because you’re bored.
Procrastination is also a common student complaint. It can result from poor time management, as you suspect. It can also be more complicated, especially in young people. Teens are notorious procrastinators. Putting things off is almost an adolescent trait. Let’s talk about why. If we are aware of what causes behavior, we are more likely to create a plan to fix it.
People may procrastinate because their expectations of what they can accomplish are unrealistic. I’ve been guilty of saying “yes” to projects when I know I don’t really have time to get them done. If this is part of your procrastination, set a goal to be more realistic about time and prioritize two or three major tasks daily. Time management is pretty basic. Make lists. Schedule tasks when you have more energy. Divide your projects into small, doable pieces. Create a work environment with few distractions where you can be productive. Add extra time for your task to allow for technical problems and life challenges. Be flexible.
Teens may procrastinate for deeper reasons. Self-doubt can enter into a tendency to procrastinate, as can a fear of change. I know most people think teens are fearless. They can be. The thrills of riding a roller coaster, skateboarding or driving fast are linked to adolescence. What if the task at hand is threatening because it tests a young person’s ability?
If an assignment requires change, when the outcome is high (the way a senior project is linked to graduation), or when the task might reveal aspects of a teen’s personal identity and demand soul-searching, putting it off can be a result of fear. Facing potential failure requires courage. What if a person writes a school paper and receives a poor grade? Isn’t it easier to simply put off the assignment until the last minute? Blame for failure can then be shifted to time management – “I didn’t have time to do a good job on the paper, so I blew it.” – instead of facing reality. Seeking a teacher’s help, finding a mentor or attending an after-school tutoring session involves facing weakness. Putting it off is safer.
Teens may also procrastinate because they feel they have no control over their lives. Once you’ve begun procrastinating, you realize you’re now in control. If your procrastination is more than acquiring time-management skills, try to:
• Face your fear of change: Awareness is key. Are you afraid of failure? Dig deep. Being afraid isn’t a sign of weakness. Acknowledging your fear shows strength. Talk with a trusted adult.
• Focus on outcomes: What are your goals? Write them down, draw a picture of the path you’d like to follow, create a poem about your future. Set small goals. If an assignment is due in two weeks, schedule a little time every day to work on it.
• Stop making excuses: I often hear “I work best under pressure” from teens. My favorite excuse dealt with the supposed end of the world on Dec. 21, 2012. Young people told me they didn’t need to complete assignments because no one would be alive to collect them on Dec. 22.
• Face reality: What if you do stumble and fail? Many really successful people fail. Bill Gates’ first business failed, Benjamin Franklin dropped out of school at age 10, and Albert Einstein didn’t speak until he was 4. Be proud of trying. Everyone makes mistakes. The key is learning from them.
• Select positive mentors and role models: Surround yourself with people who validate your worth. Avoid negativity. Seek support. Create a group of cheerleaders who are on your side.
You can do this. Good luck!
Peer Educator response
Sounds like a lot of us! Procrastination doesn’t work. Listen to Mary Jo. You’re only hurting yourself.
Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email at podmj@healthyteens.com.