Aug 19, 2021 5 min read

Q. Why are people hating my mom? She’s a nurse. She works in a COVID-19 unit. She’s been there forever, like since the pandemic. She worries about me and my brothers. She changes and showers before she touches us. She wears all kinds of gear at work to protect us. She’s vaccinated, so is my dad and my older brother. Me and my younger brother are too young to get the shot.

I see how tired my mom is.

I see her cry when she thinks I’m not watching.

Right now, she is worried because our school isn’t requiring masks. It’s voluntary, they said. I may be just a kid, but even I know what that means. No one will wear one. My brothers and I will, even the one who is vaccinated. She spoke out about how masks are important and that’s why people started hating her.

My question to you is this. Is there any way I can speak up for my mom? She’s a really good mom. I want people to respect her. I know I’m young. I read you column every week. At first – please don’t be hurt – I started reading it because my dad made me. Now I kind of like them. You always talk about giving young people a voice.

Can an 11-year-old have a voice?

If so, what can I do? I don’t care if I’m the only kid wearing a mask at school. I don’t even care if people make fun of me. See, someday this pandemic will be over and someday I may have my own kids. I want to be able to tell them how proud they should be of their grandma. I want to tell them I used my voice.

11-year-old

Mary Jo’s Response: You just used your voice with courage and wisdom.

By defending your mom and sharing your story, you speak for her and for all health care workers facing a long 18 months of dealing with the pandemic. By sharing your words, you show how strong an 11-year-old can be. Thank you.

You are brave to say you’re not troubled by being mocked. I believe the adults in your school should protect you. You should not be made fun of for doing what your parents taught you. You should feel safe wearing a mask.

It’s hard to understand why anyone would hate your mom. When people are very angry, they often sound hateful. I’m sorry. Adults need to do better. I honor your mom. I respect her and all health care workers. Your mom is to be respected for working in a challenging time and caring for others.

Your words are beautiful. Your love for your mom is obvious, as is your ability to put your thoughts into words. Have you thought of being a writer? We have a Writer’s Club at the Common Ground Teen Center. I think you would enjoy it. I’m especially proud of the wisdom in your last words. Few people think of the legacy their actions will bring in the future.

You are a mature, caring young person!

I often seek wisdom from our peer educators. This time, I wanted to gather comments from young people who were brave enough to sign their names to their thoughts. I decided to avoid comments from teens under 18. Instead, I sought out two peer educator alumni. I am proud of you, and I am proud of them. When you are older, you can become a trained peer educator and teach others. By writing to me, you were a teacher today!

Please continue using your voice! It is worthy and so are you.

Peer Educator Alumni: Matthew Stroop: I don’t think I have any more encouraging words on this topic. I’m tired. I’m tired of repeating the same information over and over again. The people that are open to changing their minds have already done so, those who have not simply won’t and they’ll continue to be mean to this child’s mother and everyone else. Keep yourself safe, know you did your best, move on the best you can.

Maci Ward: I am currently employed at a long-term care facility and have been exposed to COVID-19. I try to educate residents and families, and be as safe as possible during work and in my free time to ensure the safety of not only myself, but my family and my residents. I know I speak for all health care employees when I say we’ve been met with questioning and even anger while just trying to take the measures needed to protect ourselves and our residents. Please know we are doing the right thing by protecting those who we serve – and everyone else we meet – and would like to encourage people, despite political beliefs, to please research the virus and the benefits of masks.

This is not a political issue, but a medical one.

Also, appreciate your healthcare workers; it takes a village to keep everyone safe. From the housekeepers and dining employees to doctors, nurses and aides, everyone is doing their best to keep your loved ones safe. Thank your mom for me, it’s people like her who have kept us safe and helped many recover from the virus. Also, know you always have a voice. Educating those around you is the best way to use your voice and show appreciation for your mom’s work.

Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email podmj@healthyteens.com.