close

Family history: Taking steps to understand cancer diagnosis critical to survival

4 min read

Q. I’m afraid. My mom had breast cancer and died when I was three. I don’t really remember her, except for the stories people tell me that I sometimes think maybe I remember. My aunt raised me. Now she’s been diagnosed with breast cancer. She’s my mom’s sister. My grandma died of ovarian cancer.

Our family is the kind of family that doesn’t talk about things like this. I’m afraid for my aunt and I’m afraid for me. I started to look things up online and that only made me more afraid. I don’t want to do something horrible like have a mastectomy now, but it looks like that’s one of the recommendations in my case. I’m not a teen anymore, but I remember how safe you made me feel when I was in high school.

I need someone to keep me from panicking. Right now I’m in denial, doing nothing, just worrying.

33-year-old

Mary Jo’s response: I’m so glad you connected with me. Being afraid in your situation is normal. It will be my pleasure to help you process what’s happening in your family. Of course this is scary, but communicating with a health care provider and with your aunt will increase your knowledge and, hopefully, ease your mind.

Cancer is a scary word. Your family history gives you reasons to be afraid. A great deal has changed in cancer treatment in the 30 years since you lost your mom, though. Research led to treatments with higher survival rates. Chemo drugs in common use now were not even developed when your mom was diagnosed. Depending on how early your aunt’s breast cancer was discovered, her chances of surviving may be very good.

Talking honestly with your aunt is important to you both. Share your fear. Seeking information online can be intimidating and lead to misinformation. Your aunt’s oncologist would be a great place to start educating yourself. You could combine your need to communicate with your aunt with your need to be informed. Ask her if you can attend an appointment with her.

Here are some questions you should ask:

1. What type of breast cancer did your mom face?

2. Is your aunt’s breast cancer the same type?

3. Has your family had genetic testing? With your history, testing is important. Your risk is elevated, but it’s important to have a plan for prevention.

4. What is the best treatment plan for your aunt?

5. How can you plan to be proactive? Are mammograms, ultrasounds or MRIs recommended for you?

6. What lifestyle choices will help you lower risk?

Genetic testing and an appointment with a breast cancer specialist can help you determine your personal risk. Yes, prophylactic mastectomies or removal of ovaries are sometimes advised, but your individual history and the genetics behind it will help you determine what’s best for you. Prophylactic simply means protective. In some genetic situations, these protective surgeries are recommended, but not in all. The key is you’re not alone.

Specialists in breast cancer diagnosis and treatment can guide you to do all you can to protect yourself and lower risk. Your aunt has more and better treatment options than your mother did. Your love for her and your own need to be at peace with your family cancer history should encourage you to connect with health care providers who can help.

Cancer doesn’t mean death.

It does mean a proactive response. Fear is a normal part of life. Fear can be a motivation, but it can also paralyze us. You’re wise. You know denial isn’t healthy. You reached out to me because you want to know what to do to avoid panic. Facing your fear is a great first step. The dreadful things we imagine may not become reality. Seek professional support and honest answers.

May your aunt’s treatment go smoothly. May your consultation with a specialist ease your mind. I wish you both health, peace and joy.

Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email podmj@healthyteens.com.

CUSTOMER LOGIN

If you have an account and are registered for online access, sign in with your email address and password below.

NEW CUSTOMERS/UNREGISTERED ACCOUNTS

Never been a subscriber and want to subscribe, click the Subscribe button below.

Starting at $3.75/week.

Subscribe Today