Feeling frustration about pandemic is normal
COVID-19 continues to cause stress a year after the first lockdown. I often receive questions about the pandemic. Here are a few. Adults, please remember – young people listen and observe our behavior.
Q. I don’t get it. We need to wear our masks at school, and we get yelled at if we touch our faces, but my one teacher is horrible with her own mask. Half the time it’s below her nose. Why do we have to do things right and she doesn’t?
10-year-old
Mary Jo’s Response: You’ve raised an important concern. There’s an old saying: “Do as I say, not as I do.” Yes, there are times when adults do not follow their own rules. Feeling frustrated in this situation is normal. Talking with her might help. She may not be aware of her behavior. You and your classmates could write her a respectful note. If other teachers or your guidance counselor wear their masks correctly, you could ask them for support. Doing the right thing because it is the right thing shows maturity. Good for you.
Q. My parents are really strict about COVID-19, mostly because my gaga lives with us and she’s sick. I don’t mind protecting her. She matters to me. But I don’t see any friends and I do cyber. Cyber is OK, but I miss my friends. We used to text and use messenger and sometimes FaceTime, but not so much anymore. I feel like I have no friends. To make it worse, some of my friends’ families are acting like COVID-19 is over. I’m lonely.
12-year-old
Mary Jo’s Response: I wish things were better. At least half of the texts I receive from young people deal with loneliness because of the pandemic. You’re not alone. I am proud of the way you want to protect your grandma. You’re facing a difficult time. At 12, friendships are often “off and on,” even without a pandemic, but COVID-19 makes things harder.
Please try to remember you are worthy. One of the best ways to feel less lonely is reaching out to others. Are other classmates using cyber? Could you ask your cyber teacher to help you connect with other students?
Our Common Ground Teen Center offers virtual programs. You can log onto our link and play Dungeons & Dragons, attend our Art Club, Book Club or Cooking Club, or be part of Games Night. You can train to be a peer educator virtually and teach others without leaving home. I will send you our link. You will meet great people your age. Let’s stay in touch.
Peer Educator Response: Some of us are in the exact situation as you. Join us. We’ve made good friends with people through our weekly virtual programs. Cooking Club is so much fun. We take turns cooking and teaching others.
Q. I don’t understand. Why can’t people my age get the vaccine? It’s not fair.
13-year-old
Mary Jo’s Response: It isn’t fair, but I can explain why. Scientists were focused on the age group of people most likely to experience a strong reaction to the virus – those over 65 – and on health care workers on the front lines caring for very sick patients. Studies are now in process to look at how people under 16 react to the vaccine. It will be available to people your age in time. It is hard to be patient. Thank you for trying.
Q. Our favorite restaurant is only open for take-out but right beside it there’s a restaurant that is always packed. People are crammed in the waiting area. I even saw the receptionist at the door, and she wasn’t masked. My dad takes chemotherapy, and his counts are low. When I see people act like COVID-19 is no big deal, I want to cry. I don’t expect you to have an answer to the reality that some adults do not take COVID-19 seriously. I just wanted to vent. Thanks.
15-year-old
Mary Jo’s Response: People live by their own moral code or compass. Some do the right thing for the community. Others do not consider the way their behavior can hurt another person. You are developing your own moral compass. Share your feelings with trusted adults. Venting can relieve stress. Please continue to connect with me. I hope your dad responds well to chemotherapy.
Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email podmj@healthyteens.com.