In case you missed it…
As a public service, I present a few stories you may have missed in the brouhaha following the Nov. 5 presidential election.
* Feeling stressed because your candidate fared poorly two weeks ago? Buy a kazoo. Author Linda Stone touts the advantages of humming in a recent blog post. “A few months ago, I was on a call with one of my favorite neuroscientists. I had been reviewing a set of draft documents for someone else and was a little stressed about the material. I jokingly mentioned that I knew humming would be a good stress break. He said, ‘Even better, keep a kazoo next to your computer.'” Stone says the benefits of humming include “relief from stress and anxiety, decrease in heart rate, increase in lymphatic circulation, an increase in nasal nitric oxide” and stimulation of the vagus nerve, which carry signals between your brain, heart and digestive system. Hmmm!
* Applejack, Rarity and Fluttershy: The new Pittsburgh Penguins fourth line? No! They are some of the characters that populate the world of My Little Pony (MLP), a popular eighties franchise aimed at young girls. About 1,200 MLP characters exist. Maybe that’s why a committee at the Strong National Museum of Play in Rochester, N.Y., enshrined the breed last week in the National Toy Hall of Fame. Each of the “Mane Six” ponies carries a name that is identified with a characteristic. Taken together, the Mane Six create harmony — sorely needed in this day and age. Applejack (honesty), Rarity (generosity) and Fluttershy (kindness) might just help you feel better about the state of the world. So, go on … join the bridal party!
* The euthanization of a pet squirrel in New York may have helped Donald Trump retake the White House. New York state conservation agents seized Peanut, a squirrel with more than 750,000 Instagram followers, after neighbors complained about wildlife being kept improperly. Peanut was to be released to the wild after being examined by agents, but the feisty rodent bit a team member and was euthanized because of the possibility it carried rabies. The incident became a rallying cry for the Trump campaign and Republicans, who claimed the seizure was a symbol of government overreach. “RIP Peanut,” said a video post on the Trump campaign’s official TikTok account. “Needlessly murdered by Democrat bureaucrats in New York,” it continued. “We will avenge you at the ballot box!” The post garnered more than 9 million views prior to Nov. 5, and Trump won the popular vote by about 3 million. Just sayin’.
* The Pittsburgh Downtown Partnership (PDP) has put a crimp in Krampus. The Dec. 5 celebration of Krampusnacht 2024 will be held at Penn Brewery, on the city’s North Side, rather than in Market Square, as in 2023. Problems with parking, electricity and sound at last year’s event led to a standoff between event organizer Mark Menold and the PDP, which asked Menold to “find somewhere else next year.” Krampusnacht stars Krampus, a half-goat, half-demon monster that punishes misbehaving children during the Christmas season. In folklore, Krampus and St. Nicholas arrive on the evening of Dec. 5. While St. Nicholas leaves gifts for good little children, Krampus beats naughty kids with branches and sticks.
In a statement, President-elect Trump said he plans to nominate Krampus to head the newly developed Ministry of IOTSCN: It’s OK to Say Christmas Now. “I mean, Christmas!” Trump said. “It’s the best holiday ever! We couldn’t say ‘Merry Christmas’ for a long, dark period of time because, you know … they didn’t like it! But they lost. And it will be beautiful. No one ever had had a Christmas like we will. Let’s all sing! Fa la la la la …”