My head looks like a war zone. It’s as if those little green Army men staged an attack on my face. Everything below my nose looks like the DMZ. This morning, someone said, “What’s wrong with your face?” I thought it was a setup for a joke, but I’m not in ninth grade, and my old ...
My Seasonal Affective Disorder always jumps into high gear on the last day of summer. I have often noted that Labor Day weekend is the season's three-day mourning period. It’s a wake for the last wakeboard ride. We go, instantly, from picnic to pumpkin patch. Yesterday, I drove past a ...
I don’t want to knock any successful Pittsburgh businesses, but Duolingo is stressing me out. That little green owl is on my back about not conjugating my verbs. Every morning there’s a red dot on my Duolingo app. I react to the bright-scarlet circle like it’s a red alert on a ...
I don’t want to sound like Methuselah, but a long time ago, before I grew a long, white beard and dispensed knowledge to my acolytes, I could call a person or business center, and someone would pick up on the other end. Remember when you could talk to people? I do. You didn’t have to ...
I have learned that the best way to conquer the annoyances of daily life is to use humor as a weapon. It is a powerful tool. I use comedy to lower my blood pressure. That, and Carvedilol twice a day. Beta blockers and buffoonery are the best way to beat high blood pressure. Petty grievances ...
I am making a concerted effort to be more positive. I don’t just want to look on the bright side of life; I want to live on the bright side of life, smiling and waving to all the miserable people on the other side. I’d love to tell you that it’s easy to maintain a positive attitude in ...
