Jun 26, 2026 By Katherine Mansfield 4 min read

EDITOR’S NOTE: This is one in a monthlong series of profiles of the people who live and work in Washington, Greene and Fayette counties, in celebration of the nation’s 250th anniversary.

DeeDee van Fredenberg opened the door to Main St. Cafe and followed her three children inside, where the family was greeted by a chorus of hellos from the folks seated around the eight-top. The waitress wondered if everyone was having their usual drinks. Van Fredenberg smiled “yes” as the kids clambered into chairs near the window overlooking Claysville’s Main Street.

“This is our spot,” said van Fredenberg, settling her youngest, Tyson, 18 months, in her lap. “I’ve lived a lot of places, and this has been, like, the most welcoming ever.”

Van Fredenberg grew up in Arizona. She and her husband met in Oklahoma, where he was born and raised, while attending classes at Oklahoma Panhandle State University. He was a single father of three, but that was no matter.

“I saw him and that was it,” van Fredenberg said.

The couple tied the knot on St. Patrick’s Day (“the luckiest day of the year,” van Fredenberg laughed) of 2013. Their elopement was a whirlwind celebration of the marathon they’d just completed – the Bataan Memorial Death March, 26.2 grueling miles through New Mexico desert. Van Fredenberg was three months pregnant with the couple’s first child, Merton, when they crossed the finish line together.

“I’d been training for it and training for it, and I was gonna go. I was like, you know, if I can make it through this marathon, with this man, in the desert, and we are, like, having fun and having a good time and still like each other,” van Fredenberg smiled. “I knew for sure at the end.”

The couple “followed the oil field up here,” she said, “and we fell in love with Claysville. We’ve lived here the longest we’ve lived anywhere.”

Van Fredenberg moved a lot throughout childhood, too, for her father’s work, and over the years she’s been different versions of herself. She was a 4-H girl, a rodeo queen representing Navajo County at parades and events, a distance runner. Van Fredenberg’s been an elementary school librarian, a university biology teacher and a greenhouse employee. But of all the roles she’s played, “mother” is her favorite.

“It’s my purpose,” said van Fredenberg, who is due with her fourth child in August, and will then have seven children total. “It hasn’t always been easy, especially because, you know, having to have the blended family. But I’m the mom. I’ve always been there, and I’m super close with all my kids. I just love them so much. I feel like if there’s anything worth doing, this is it.”

This year marked the family’s first homeschool year, an eye-opening experience.

“I didn’t realize how much time I was missing with them,” said van Fredenberg. “We get up. We do our schoolwork, and then we do chores, and then we play. Not always in that order.”

Days are spent experiencing the world at the family’s pace. When they aren’t dining at Main St. Cafe, van Fredenberg joked, the kids are responsible for making their own lunches. They take care of the family’s cat and dogs and chickens (her daughter, Rowan, takes her pet chicken a lot places in a little backpack), and together the family tends a small garden.

“I’m really into botany. I love learning about plants and herbs and edible things. We go out and forage stuff around the house. We collect lavender. We’re learning how to dry it and preserve it,” van Fredenberg said.

The life sounds idyllic, and it can be, but while she remains social media-free and emphasizes some crunchy mom tropes, the family watches movies together, and van Fredenberg uses technology just like her millennial mom peers. She’s just realistic about where we’re at tech-wise, and where we’re going, and trying to help her kids navigate the shifting digital landscape – in part by knowing how to grow their own food in quiet little Claysville.

“Technology is evolving faster than we can imagine, and faster than it has in any time,” van Fredenberg said. “That’s something that we’re going to have to deal with. I just try to teach them that there’s just different ways to do things. And be mindful.”