Living will ensures person’s wishes are followed
David E. Martin, a financial planner and Realtor, speaks to the audience at Peters Township Public Library about living wills.
David E. Martin, a finacial planner and Realtor, speaks to the audience at Peters Township Public Library about living wills.
McMURRAY – David E. Martin, a financial planner and Realtor, began his presentation of the Five Wishes living will at Peters Township Public Library with a relevant story. He recalled attending a client’s funeral, where, to his chagrin, he saw the military medals of the deceased on display. Martin knew that his client had wanted his medals buried with him; unfortunately, his family did not.
While dealing with end-of-life care and wishes can be overwhelming and emotional, misunderstandings like these are avoidable, Martin said. He believes a great way for someone to convey their wishes for end-of-life care is the Five Wishes living will, a simple form that allows people to communicate their desires if they become ill and are unable to speak for themselves.
Martin has worked with people for decades, helping them plan for the end of life. He admits that it’s not a comfortable topic for most.
“Dying is a subject nobody wants to talk about,” he said. “Too many times, families come to me and they don’t know how to talk about it. But if you’re married, you should talk about this with your spouse and your kids.”
Martin said even those who are single or young should communicate their wishes for the end of life.
“If you’re a young family, ask yourself, if you pass away, what do you want your kids to do? What do you want for them?”
He recommended Five Wishes as a simple, legally binding document that does not require the use of an attorney.
Five Wishes, which is available at www.agingwithdignity.org, was created by Aging with Dignity founder Jim Towey, who served as Mother Teresa’s legal counsel for 12 years. Towey credits her interest in all a person’s needs, including medical, emotional and spiritual, as the inspiration for Five Wishes.
The document allows the user to address five issues: who you want to make health-care decisions for you when you can’t ; the kind of medical treatment you want; how comfortable you want to be; how you want people to treat you; and what you want your loved ones to know, including funeral arrangements and how you would like to be remembered. It allows you to write in specifics, and cross out anything you don’t agree with.
The form covers issues from “what life-support treatment means to me” to “I wish to be cared for with kindness and cheerfulness, and not sadness.” It also provides spaces to write any other matters a person might want their loved ones to know.
“I’ve seen so many fractured families over this stuff,” said Martin. “Take control of these things. Write it all down. It’s not difficult to follow.”
He fielded questions from a group that had gathered for the seminar, and gave advice for using the document, including making copies for loved ones and keeping one in a car so that it’s always available. Martin also suggested, due to life changes such as births and divorces, to redo the document every two years and to be as specific as possible. And while there are only two spots on the document for witness signatures, Martin suggests getting three witnesses to sign, which allows the will to be presented in court without the witnesses present.
Spouses Dennis and Laurie Franks attended the seminar as a starting point for putting a will together.
“We were looking into getting a living will and doing something with our finances,” said Dennis. “This really helped us.”