Jan 26, 2019 4 min read

Grieving the deaths of four family members – and her precious dog – in just the last year, Katie McWilliams looked for ways to cope with her emotions.

Although McWilliams made managing a lively household of four girls with her husband, Bill, look effortless, she struggled with some anxiety and depression.

“I was searching for self-care techniques to help me through the day-to-day, and to help me cultivate some happiness and peace. I came across the definition of ‘hygge’ on Pinterest,” the North Strabane resident said.” It spoke to me immediately, and snowballed from there.”

Hygge – pronounced hoo-guh- is a Danish term with no direct translation to English, but is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as “a quality of coziness and comfortable conviviality that engenders a feeling of contentment or well-being.” Danes used it as both a noun and an adjective, and hygge was their way of life.

Hygge was part of the Danish culture since the 18th century when they found a way to endure the long winters by lighting candles, wrapping up in warm blankets in front of the fire, eating comfort foods and gathering with friends and family. This tradition was ingrained in the Danish culture and was part of their identity. They intentionally looked for ways to bring themselves comfort and joy, and were admittedly obsessed with that feeling of hygge.

In contrast, Americans obsess with being busy, and it comes with a price. According to a 2018 survey by the American Psychological Association, Americans are more stressed than ever with anxiety, depression, eating disorders, attention problems, drug abuse and suicidal behaviors on the rise, especially among young people.

While Danes embraced relaxation and self-care, Americans made little time for leisure activities. Even American children were overscheduled with sports and other activities.

When several popular books about hygge were released in 2016 and 2017, some overstressed Americans were open to this new way of life. Hygge was about enjoying time together in a relaxing environment.

McWilliams was one of those Americans who fully embraced hygge at a time in her life when she needed the comfort and self-care elements that it encouraged. When first introduced to it, she was intentional about making life changes, but it soon became second nature. She found hygge by turning the “ordinary” into the “extraordinary” simply by changing her frame of mind.

After adopting a puppy, McWilliams was overwhelmed caring for a new pet, especially taking the puppy outside in the middle of the night.

“Then, light bulb! I could choose to be miserable about it, or I could choose happiness in those moments,” she said. “I try to be in the moment. I breathe in the cold air. I look up at the stars and the moon. And I am grateful that I get to have this beautiful puppy and enjoy the beautiful night.”

McWilliams found that she was easily able to introduce hygge into her life.

“Take 15 minutes out of the day. Turn off all the screens and phones. Sit quietly with a beverage of choice and make a list of the things that you find ultimately comforting, things that bring happiness” she suggested. “Then going forward, implement those things into your daily life. I don’t mean material things. I mean burning candles you used to save for special occasions. Drinking the good tea you save for company. Let each day include a small celebration of life. Pray or meditate, whatever your persuasion.”

While visions of fuzzy blankets and hot chocolate were associated with hygge, McWilliams realized that hygge was different for everyone.

“Sitting alone in a tree stand for four hours at a time on an autumn day is ultimate hygge for me. Alone with my thoughts and the scents of damp earth and autumn leaves, watching squirrels collect walnuts. I pray more while hunting than at any other time,” McWilliams said. “It is also hygge to come home afterward, and curl up on the couch with a mug of hot chocolate.”

For her upcoming birthday, McWilliams planned to celebrate in a hygge way. She requested a family candlelight dinner, complete with comfort food, board games and hot chocolate by the fire. A lot was different in her life since she found hygge, and small changes made a world of difference.

“I used to be a candle saver,” she said. “Now I burn the candles. Burn all the candles all the time.”