Tips on tipping
Q. I’ve held a job since I was old enough to be employed. Right now, I work two jobs and go to school full time. My question is more of a vent, and I appreciate you listening. I work in a restaurant. I started bussing tables a year ago and now I wait tables. I enjoy it. I’m the kind of person who enjoys other people, I’m young and have lots of energy, and I like my co-workers. Why complain? Because I’m starting to be very annoyed at people who either do not tip or tip very poorly.
Even though I don’t mind the work and I try my best to do it well, I don’t get paid well. None of the wait staff receives even minimum wage. I wonder if people know that, or if they know and just don’t care. I agree if staff do not do as good a job as they can, the tip may reflect that, but it doesn’t seem to be about performance. I receive low tips – or no tips – from certain customers, regardless of service.
It’s also important to note that a server doesn’t cook the meal. If it’s not to a customer’s liking, don’t take it out on the person who brought it to the table. Thanks for listening and thanks for putting at least part of this in your column. Please tell people to tip! – 18-year-old
Mary Jo’s Response: Two jobs and a full high school load! I hope things ease for you this summer. I’m impressed with your work ethic. I also hope you take some time to have fun.
Your words are wise, and I am printing them unedited. I agree with everything you said. I’ve been in countries where tipping is not the norm, but in those situations wait staff are paid a higher wage.
I believe, if restaurant customers cannot afford to tip well, they should be eating at home! I consider the tip part of the price of the meal.
It’s always possible a customer is unaware of the need to tip; your email educates in that case. Culture can play a part in tipping as well; my papa, who was a very generous man, did not like to tip. When we went to eat with him, we always slipped the tip into the bill. He meant well but was uncomfortable in restaurants. In fact, we learned the hard way that he would order whatever my husband ordered, “I’ll have what my son-in-law is having” – whether or not he liked the entrée.
Education counts, culture matters, and I thank you for giving me a chance to teach.
Q. I want to get a job in a restaurant, but my mom says the work is too hard for me. I told her I’m strong and I learn quickly. I want to give it a try. If I hate the job, I could always quit. She said she doesn’t want me to be a quitter, so I need to consider the pros and cons of the job before I take it. Is my mom right? – 16-year-old
Mary Jo’s Response: I’ll share my thoughts about teens your age working, but I’m not taking sides between you and your mom! I do believe in making a pro/con sheet for decisions. It might help you to problem-solve the situation. First, ask yourself why you want a job? How much money will you spend going to and from work? Will you need to buy new outfits? Second, think about balancing schoolwork and the job. Will you have time to do both? Will you need to give up activities like sports or clubs? High school is an important growth time. It’s possible to have a job at 16, but it is important to consider all possibilities. Good luck.
Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email podmj@healthyteens.com.