Paying it forward
Patrick Arena was diagnosed with depression 17 years ago and is celebrating 29 years of sobriety. Arena is a peer specialist at Greenbriar Treatment Center.
Patrick Arena manages a three-quarter house for recovering addicts and works at Greenbriar Treatment Center. Arena will celebrate 29 years of sobriety Sept. 1.
Patrick Arena manages a three-quarter house in Washington for recovering addicts. He named the house Murphy House after his mother’s maiden name. His parents and siblings had lived in the house many years ago.
Patrick Arena celebrates 29 years of sobriety on Sept. 1.
The retired jazz singer, who now manages a three-quarter house for recovering addicts in Washington and works at Greenbriar Treatment Center, admits that sometimes he’s surprised he survived his self-destructive behavior.
“I didn’t make good choices. I would get drunk a lot and black out a lot. I used a lot of marijuana, cocaine, pills. I didn’t care or know what the pill even was,” said Arena, 65. “If you had something and you offered it to me, I was like, ‘Yeah!'”
Arena was diagnosed with depression 17 years ago.
He doesn’t recall “ever being a particularly happy person,” and he said he unknowingly struggled with depression his entire life.
It also took Arena, who is gay, several years to come to terms with his sexuality.
One thing that brought Arena joy was music, and after he graduated from Washington High School, he headed to New York City to pursue a singing career.
He had some success, performing in night clubs and on stage. But Arena’s drug and alcohol use, fueled by his depression, cost him chances to advance in show business.
“I missed out on a lot of opportunities because I was either too hung over to get myself together or too out of shape to show up where I was supposed to be, and you’ve got to show up well for these opportunities,” said Arena, who recalled missing an audition for a major commercial because he had spent the night before drinking to celebrate being selected to compete for the part.
By the time he was 36, Arena felt like he had hit rock bottom.
He sought help to quit drinking and taking drugs.
But even though he gave up those habits, Arena still wasn’t happy. He had suicidal thoughts.
He even devised a plan to walk to a pier on the Hudson River, tie his boots together and jump off.
“That was my plan. But I didn’t follow through,” said Arena. “What I did was call somebody instead.”
He visited a psychiatrist, who diagnosed him with depression.
“I was quite shocked to find out I had a mental illness. But it made sense, and there was some relief in having answers about what I had been experiencing,” said Arena. “But I didn’t like it, and so I had my own stigma about it, which I’ve worked through.”
Soon after, Arena began a regimen of anti-depression medication and therapy, which have helped him find happiness in his life.
“I feel like I’m happy to be alive, happy to even be growing older,” said Arena. “I appreciate the wisdom that I’ve accumulated from my experiences in life. I appreciate who I am as a result of all these seemingly scary, negative experiences.”
Arena returned to Washington in 1999 and continued his music career, which included recording three CDs.
But the more he dealt with people in the mental health and recovery fields, the more Arena felt compelled to “pay it forward.”
More than a decade ago, Arena began working for AMI, a nonprofit agency that provides psychiatric rehabilitation to adults recovering from mental illness and co-occurring disorders.
He left AMI to work as a peer specialist at Greenbriar.
“I just love working with people who are trying to get better. I love seeing that happen,” said Arena.
About a year ago, he was asked to manage the three-quarter house.
He was intrigued, but then Arena found out something about the house that made it impossible for him to resist: It was owned by his family during World War II.
“When I found out this was the house where my parents had lived and my siblings had lived here, there was no question that it was a sign that I needed to try this out,” said Arena.
He named it the Murphy House, after his mother’s maiden name.
Ten men live in the Murphy House and a three-quarter house next door.
The occupants often come from a halfway house, a residence for people who have completed a stint in rehab.
“This is another step in their journey back into being a productive member of society,” said Arena. “If you walk in here and you’ve been in a halfway house, you’re already six months sober. This is another step. You’re still with people in recovery, you’re still progressing. Sometimes this can be tough because they’re getting back to real life, and real life can be difficult. But these guys are all doing really well. This place gives them a chance to continue to heal.”
Arena encourages those who suffer from depression or other mental illnesses and addictions to seek help and noted that Washington County has several organizations and agencies that help patients with mental illness, including the Mental Health Association, which has launched an anti-stigma campaign.
“We get so centered on ourselves, our problems, on the depression and that’s not helpful,” said Arena. “Don’t be afraid to ask for help.”
Arena, who hosts a radio show on WNJR, said working with recovering addicts fulfills him in a way that music doesn’t.
“This gives me a chance to give back. And the reason I give back is that I was very impressed and very moved by how much people gave to me in the beginning and along the way during my recovery,” said Arena. “I have tremendous gratitude for the people I met who helped me. I’m incredibly grateful for those people who were there. I really am paying a debt. I feel like I owe that.”