Let’s get Rizzy with it
Let’s face it, by the time a slang word gets to me, it’s officially over. I have reached an age where I am less likely to know hip slang words and more likely to break a hip instead.
Frankly, hip hasn’t been hip since before I was born. Before hip, it was hep. But hep went out of style shortly after Cab Calloway, Duke Ellington, and Fats Waller used it in the ’20s.
Side note: You can’t even find people named Cab, Duke, or Fats these days, and that, as Martha Stewart would say, is a good thing (there aren’t too many Marthas, either).
But I digress, like I do. I have recently researched slang words from YouTube, TikTok, and all the other time-sucking social media platforms so that you don’t have to, and I’m ready to share.
A TikToker in Baltimore divided up the word charisma into sections, and rizz was the result. If someone says, “You have rizz,” it’s not the latest shampoo (it sounds like a shampoo); it means you have game, swagger, or charisma.
If someone, perhaps the same person who said you have rizz, thinks your outfit is “snatched,” it means you look beautiful or handsome. It doesn’t mean that it looks like you stole your clothes from off the rack at Nordstrom’s. Though, if you stole your clothes from Nordstrom’s, you would look snatched.
To be “on fleek” means “on point.” It’s another strange compliment. It usually refers to women who have plucked their eyebrows to the point where they resemble either Daphne from “Scooby Doo” or Mr. Spock from “Star Trek.” In other words, if you have cartoonishly over-arched eyebrows and look permanently surprised, your brows are on fleek.
Speaking of surprises. If you’re shook, you mean to say you’re surprised because you are – most likely – an adult. I will only let a person get away with saying “I was shook” if we were in an earthquake together. In other words, you will only be forgiven for using the phrase if a house falls on you.
To “Stan” a celebrity or sports figure, is to become obsessed with that person in a not-so-creepy way. It’s a portmanteau of stalker and fan, and yet, it’s not meant to be creepy. When I think Stan, I think Herb Edelman’s Stanley Zbornak, Dorothy’s much-maligned ex-husband on “The Golden Girls.” I guarantee there are no Stan stans out there.
GOAT (Greatest Of All Time) is the greatest of all cliches. I heard someone referring to their breakfast cereal as the GOAT. Let’s put the GOAT out to pasture, please.
If all these words seem cheugy, you’re right. Something that is cheugy is no longer relevant. It’s outdated. If it’s cheugy, it’s cringe, which is another slang word that is mildewed. It’s cringe-worthy.
See what I did there?
By the sheer act of mentioning these slang words, they have become obsolete, and I couldn’t be happier. Now, get out there and use your own words, not someone else’s.